first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
