seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
