Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
