Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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