Buhtt sex?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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