when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
