The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
