i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
