I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize