On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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