end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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