So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
