she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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