There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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