You just made me feel so damn special
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Randomize
