she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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