she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
