i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Randomize
