My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
