I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
We named our party play list daddy issues
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
stop calling my apartment porn island.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
