belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
