Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize
