I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
