Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
