I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Dicks are not precious.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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