he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
