Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
