I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
