i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
