And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Randomize
