i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
