sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Drake has all the answers
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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