i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
