i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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