There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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