Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
