so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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