A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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