she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
