I heard we made out
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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