i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
there was a trapeze. enough said
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
