I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
