it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I have already put on my inside pants.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
