Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
this will be a night to untag.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Randomize
