Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize