Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
