while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
