so explain again why im purple
no
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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