He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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