You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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